20 questions: Jackie

1. Tell us a little about who makes your house a home.  

Matt:  My hubby of 4+ years.  We’ve been together 8.5 years.  He is a validation engineer and a home improvement DIY extraordinaire.  He is a wonderful dad, which is probably why both girls are daddy’s girls.



Mila: She is my adorable 2.5 year old who we call Mimi.  She is so lively and animated.  Every emotion is extreme.  She keeps me on my toes and I love it.  She loves her little sister and is very helpful or willing to tell Elsie what’s going on… at least most of the time.  Current favorite activities are brushing hair (others’ or her own), coloring or playing outside.  



Elsie: She is my little 10 month old sweetheart.  Recently she spends a lot of time waving and saying “Hi”… to strangers, family or even the cat.  Elsie is often called E, E.K. (Karlisle is her middle name), Elsie K. or Els.  Elsie was born with a disability known as Proximal Femoral Focal Deficiency (PFFD).  Basically, one femur is extremely short causing one leg to be shorter than the other (currently 3” difference).  This will require many surgeries/physical therapy, but thankfully is something Elsie can live life to the fullest with.  Because of this, I’m so thankful for her sweet/laid back disposition.  Elsie says 5 words in her vocabulary, is climbing chairs/stairs and trying oh-so hard to walk.



I have a blog where I update on Elsie’s condition and treatment plan: www.elsiesleftleg.blogspot.com


2. What's a typical day in your household like? 

BUSY!  Weekdays: Wake up and get ready for work, get girls ready.  Matt usually gets Mimi ready, I get Elsie ready.  Then Matt and I both work, girls are either in daycare or a nanny at our home.  After work is busy with pick-ups/dinner/bath and trying to relax with the girls.  After bedtime for the girls Matt and I catch up around the house. 



3. How has your lifestyle changed since having children?

Everything revolves around the girls and their schedule and needs -  no longer mine/hubby’s.
 


4. Have you ever felt the need to defend your decision to start a family in your 20's?   
Yes.  I can’t think of particular instances, but I know that people – often peers – don’t understand the choice.

5. What's the most challenging thing about being a mom, and what's the most rewarding?   
Most challenging part is being a working mom.  I want to be able to always be with my girls and not rely on other care.  Simply not a reality to me at this point, but I’m working on it. 

Most rewarding is snuggles and love from my girls!  I melt when I hear “I love you” or “I Missed you all day mama” (though that’s hard to hear too)
  
6. How are household chores divided up in your family?
My hubby is the best!  He does so much around the house…probably more than me.  :-/ I do dishes, meals, girls’ laundry, common bathrooms, sheets, groceries.  Matt does pool, outdoors, maintenance, laundry, vacuuming, dusting, his bathroom.  We don’t necessarily break it out, but it usually shakes out like that.

7.   How do you find a balance between your commitments and family time?
 I don’t feel like we have the best balance, but one thing that helps is I started working from home two days a week.  This allows me more time with the girls (eliminating a commute, getting ready for work, and pick-up/drop off at daycare).  It also allows the girls to be home 4/7 days a week and together.  Also, I try to involve my girls in the household commitments if possible (i.e. Mimi helps me cook/bake) or wait until they are in bed to get stuff done.

8. What's your most embarrassing mom moment?  
Hands down, my most embarrassing moment was when I locked Mila in the car at daycare.  I not only was horrified that I did it, but the daycare director, work guards and my boss had to find out.  Embarrassing!!

9. Who (or what) has influenced your parenting style the most?
I think obviously my parents have (both what to and what not to do!) as well as my Gma and Gpa Sauers.  However, I have a good friend with two little ones.  I truly look-up to her and think of her as a mom I want to be like.  I also constantly pray that I can become the mom that god wants me to be.  I don’t necessarily know what that is, but I hope to become it!

10. Since becoming a mom how have your friendships changed? Have you made new friends, strengthened friendships, or lost friends?
I would say that I have fewer time for friendships.  It’s hard, I have friends that I would love to get together with more, tlak to on the phone, meet for lunch, whatever…but it’s challenging to do so with two tots.  However, it is easier to hang out with friends with kids because we both understand bringing the kids, when our children are fussing/constantly interrupting or needing something in the middle of conversation.  With other parent’s you don’t have to apologize or explain.

11. How do you fit in time for your romantic relationship? 
Matt and I just try to make the conscious effort to have us time… even if it means getting a sitter, putting off chores, or staying up later than normal.  One thing I like to do is get a sitter close to bedtime so I don’t feel bad leaving the girls.  Then we go on dates later in the day when the girls are sleeping.

12. What's one piece of advice you have for future/new moms? 
Write down things you think you’ll never forget, because you will forget it.  Also, enjoy the newborn little snuggly baby… they grow up so stinkin’ fast!

13. What's your childcare set-up and why does it work for you?
M&W: I work from home and we get a nanny to come over from 0730-330.  I work early and Matt goes to work when the nanny gets here.  I stay in the basement.  I LOVE this arrangement.  It’s so nice to not have to get the girls out, plus they get to be home and together 4 days in the week (counting weekends).
 
T,Th&F: The girls go to the daycare I have at work.  This works really well because I don’t drive to a separate center. They are right next to me and I get to see Elsie on lunch. (Mimi throws a fit if she sees me and we don’t leave L )

14. Do you ever get time to yourself?
Not often.  I love to grocery shop by myself, that’s about the only me time I can count on.  However, I am in the process of setting up a craft/sewing area at my house with the goal of more me-time (which will likely be time I stay-up late to get.  LOL)

15. What was the toughest adjustment going from 1 to 2 kids?
Mimi was 20 months when Elsie was born. So the hardest thing was for her to not be the baby, but she was still quite young. On maternity leave, I dreaded EVERY time I had to nurse Elsie for weeks, if not months. Mimi cried so hard every time I fed Elsie; she was jealous for a long time. Overall though, the biggest adjustment is that Matt and I almost always are entertaining one of the kids. It sure is busy!

16. Has having children changed your relationship with food?
Well, I love chips and fast food, Matt loves sweets and all snacks. Our cupboards are quite embarrassing at times. So, now that Mimi eats everything we do and raids our cupboards we are more conscious about what we stock/eat in front of her. We try to incorporate veggies/fruit into all meals, never a priority before.

17. What are your plans for your children's education?
We are in Comstock school district.  I need to do more investigation, but I’m not sure what I think of that.  Potentially, we’ll consider schools of choice to go to Galesburg-Augusta where Matt and I both graduated from. As far as college, we have college savings started for both.

18. How is discipline handled in your family? 
Discipline is currently a time-out in our office.  Mimi has to sit in a certain chair until she is willing to talk. We check in on her periodically (about 30 seconds in – so not long).  As Mimi is getting older and more aware of consequences, discipline is becoming more and more important and Matt and I are trying hard to be consistent.  It’s hard!!

19. If you could change one thing about your current set-up, what would it be?
 I would like to be a stay-at-home mom.  Again, this is a long-term goal that I am working on.

20. Finish this sentence, Before having kids, I wish I would have known...
How much I would miss having me and Matt time!