Wednesday, April 4, 2012

What's Been Missing

Last week Love Bean's nanny was on vacation. Love Bean went to her Nanner and Poppy's for the week, and hubs and I got a week of dates! We missed her bunches and felt a little guilty for sending her there, but it was so nice to get to spend couple time together again. Aside from my friend Katie's wedding, we hadn't really been away from Love Bean since she was born 6 months ago. We spent the week going out dates and hanging out at home.

I can't even tell you how much getting to spend some alone time with Tim meant to me. Leading up to our week of alone time, I had been feeling like we were kind of just drifting along, going through the motions. Let's be real, with a baby that needs to be entertained, fed, changed and put to bed, it's easy to to forget that you're still husband and wife who need intimacy (emotional and physical).

Things I've noticed that happen less (but shouldn't!) now that we have Love Bean:
  • Random "I love yous"
  • Cuddling on the couch
  • Conversations about our hopes and dreams
  • Hugs & kisses
  • Date nights
I miss these things. Tim and I need to consciously try to balance that list with all the new things that we love about being parents, and that take up so much of our attention. After our week alone, I feel recharged and ready to make more of an effort to say an extra "I love you" or to greet Tim at the door with a kiss. Those 5 things are what make me feel close to Tim. They make me feel "young & in love" and I want to feel like for the 50+ years to come!

I think this is something most couples with a new baby go through. But it's something you feel a little guilty about admitting. Know you're not alone in longing for a night where the baby doesn't demand your attention, and you get to just sit and talk about what's in store for the future (or whatever you miss from your time before baby). It doesn't mean you love your baby less. Personally, I think that these feeling are natural and will help foster healthier relationships with your significant other and your child.

1 comment:

  1. This is right on the spot...I totally identify. We hardly ever get time alone together, and I constantly feel wiped out like I have nothing left to give, but feel like I should..


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