Thursday, November 10, 2011

onemonthandtoomuchgoingon

Alrighty, here we go. . . I am going to cut out some detail and make it shorter than it is.

Cowboy's health had been continually decreasing since last Friday. Tuesday I went and talked to a doctor and he informed me that Gat would need surgery in 4-6 weeks. They knew this by blood work and XRAYS. Then on Wednesday I got a call around 2pm from the doctor. He was letting me know that surgery will be happening sooner than we thought. I then talked to the surgeon on the phone, he said they wanted to do surgery as soon as they could (4pm). He proceeded to tell me why and what they would be doing. Gatlyn had to have a Exploratory surgery. They had to figure out what was going on with his belly. They were suspecting the NEC had killed part of his small intestines. And they were right, they went in and took out the dead intestine and left about 40 cm. Most premature babies have about 100 cm of small intestine, so they are guessing they took roughly 60 cm. He will have a temporary stoma for 6-8 weeks and after that they will do another surgery to reconnect his small intestines. There are many risk with everything that is going on. And a heck of a lot of information. But to be completely honest the more info I share, the more questions I get. So, I know this may sound harsh but, I don't want to be drilled. We know what we need to know and ask a lot of question each time we go.

Jess and I are holding up. It is hard and really unexplainable to have the feelings that we feel. Even when we talk to one another and try to explain how we feel, we can never can out exactly what we are feeling. But we know what we are feeling is the same. We are hurt, nervous, worried, scared, mad and sad all at once. Yet, nobody to really be mad. I know God has his hands all over our family, especially the fact yesterday(surgery day) everyone is in the right places. Jess happened to get rained off of work. Jesse's mom was like 1 minute away when Jess called to see if she could get the girls. And my mom and dad were home to meet us at the hospital. To be quite honest I was nervous about having my parents there. I didn't want my emotions getting in the way of listening and doing what I have to do. And I me and my mother both get pretty emotional. But Jess and I both said on the way home that we were glad they were there. And to have the girls go to Jesse's parents was perfect. JoJo being the girl she is, knew that something wasn't right and was having a hard time. His mom nanny's for a little boy and he is Andi's best friend. He took her mind off of everything. They love their grandparents. Rae was eating, therefore was as happy as can be. ha.

So now, we wait again. We pray that Cowboy starts to improve in the next few days. Because honestly, I am fed up with it and ready for him to be healthy. It doesn't seem right that my baby boy can go through more traumatic events in the first month of his life than I have in 22 years. Heartbreaking.

Oh yah, to top it all off. He was 1 month old yesterday. What a great first month for my poor boy.

All my love to my wee man and thanks to the Big Guy upstairs for getting us through.

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